How to Get People to Like You

How to Get People to Like You

July 21, 2017
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New people, new situations, and new relationships can be awkward. How do you make a great impression? Is it possible to keep a conversation going with someone that you barely know? Studies have shown that relationships are essential to long term happiness. Also, networking is huge when it comes to building a career, and that’s all about having relationships.

Robin Dreeke is a former head of the FBI’s Behavioral Analysis Program, and he knows what it takes to win people over. Here are some helpful tips from him that will help you get people to like you:

Validate Rather than Judge

When talking with someone, don’t judge them when you don’t agree. Instead, validate them by asking questions to find out more about why they feel that way.

Let Go of Your Ego

We all like to correct someone when they are not on our wavelength. Resist the desire to one up them, contradict them, and put them down. Your ego is flaring up, don’t worry about being “right” because contradicting people doesn’t build relationships.

Listen Up

In order to be a good listener, you must stop thinking about what you plan to say next and just listen. Engage with people, be curious and ask questions that are pertinent to the conversation.  Asking people to tell you more makes your more likable.

Ask About Challenges

Everyone has challenges in life, and they love to talk about them. Ask people what challenges they are facing at work, home, or with their goals. Asking questions about what challenges people face in life and being interested in what their priorities are at that point in time will build strong bonds quickly.

Make People Feel at Ease

When you first begin a conversation, let the person you are with know that you only have a short amount of time. You might also ask if now is a good time for them.  Nobody likes to feel trapped, but once you reduce their stress, they’ll be more open to you.

Body Language Matters

If your words are positive and free of ego, your body language needs to match. To build a rapport with someone, your body language must be open and nonjudgmental.

Be sure to do the following:

  • Smile
  • Stand at an angle
  • Keep your palms up which helps you to appear open

Handling Someone Untrustworthy

If you feel like someone is being untrustworthy or trying to manipulate you, be direct and ask them what they want out of this interaction.   No need to be hostile, just find out what their goals are. Watch to see if you’re being validated or if they are only there for their own gain.  If your priorities are never being addressed, they could be manipulating you.

Being liked is key to building relationships. To build relationships, you need to focus on trust and earning respect.  Be non-judgmental, focus on them, really listen and smile!
~ Written for us by our associate Gary Sorrell, Sorrell Associates, LLC. Copyright protected. All rights reserved

 

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